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January 2020

January 24, 2020 - Holding Space

Seven of us were present this week. 
As frequently happens, I was engaged in the conversation and took no notes! mea culpa. 
In our meeting, NE facilitated a discussion on Holding Space. We didn't all have an idea of just what that means, and some of us interpret it a little bit differently. But I think that by the end of the day we agreed that we do, indeed, hold space: for each other in this group; in our families; very often with our animals; and certainly when/where we become aware of needs within our circles.
We demonstrated that by lighting a candle and pointing some healing energy in Ang's direction. 
(Hope you're much better, now, Ang!)
And, we are doing it now, in our own ways, as we empathize with the pain Revin & Angela are feeling now over Rose's death.

Two others of our Salon family members are experiencing some pain in their biological families, but frankly, I get my two groups mixed up, and don't know, in this case, who knows what. So I'll just say that it is NOT necessary to know all the particulars of someones' circumstances, or even who they are, to Hold Space and wish/pray for peace, health, clarity, etc. Our intentions toward love are really all that is needed.  So spread a little around when you feel the inclination.

Irma was back for the first time since her Christmas trip and brought with her Mexican Dia de los Muertos tiles for us.
Thanks, Irma. That was sweet, and very nice to know you thought of us while you were away. Welcome home.
Every Act a Ceremony is a article I posted on our links page a few weeks ago. I brought it up again and was happy to see that it didn't freak anyone out. :)  In fact, we created a little one then and there with a candle-lighting and some silence for Angie. Kate had also shared with me a little circle that she & Mel shared with friends in Texas. She told us about that, and we practiced it at the close of our meeting. I loved it! I think we all did.
We're not creating a religion, or even a little cult, but I like that we may bring a bit of ceremony to what we do here.
Please feel free to comment further here or in the group about your feelings on this subject.

The Lost Words Blessing

Gorgeous harmony; beautiful words.... 



The lyrics:

"Enter the wild with care, my love
And speak the things you see
Let new names take and root and thrive and grow
And even as you travel far from heather, crag and river
May you like the little fisher, set the stream alight with glitter
May you enter now as otter without falter into water

Look to the sky with care, my love
And speak the things you see
Let new names take and root and thrive and grow
And even as you journey on past dying stars exploding
Like the gilded one in flight, leave your little gifts of light
And in the dead of night my darling, find the gleaming eye of starling
Like the little aviator, sing your heart to all dark matter

Walk through the world with care, my love
And sing the things you see
Let new names take and root and thrive and grow
And even as you stumble through machair sands eroding
Let the fern unfurl your grieving, let the heron still your breathing
Let the selkie swim you deeper, oh my little silver-seeker
Even as the hour grows bleaker, be the singer and the speaker
And in city and in forest, let the larks become your chorus
And when every hope is gone, let the raven call you home."

The Case for Adding New & Younger Members

All of you know that I continue to hope for a larger number of women in our Salon.
Much of that hope is based on reasons I've stated before, one being having a congenial number present when some of us are otherwise engaged, whether it be travel or illness, etc.

Another reason, and perhaps a better one, stems from my reading about Co-housing and what makes them work. Multi-generational groups fare much better over time than those limited to Olders.  We're more likely to age successfully in place if there is a range of ages, strengths, abilities, etc.  In such groups, generally, Elders' responsibilities for various maintenance tasks decrease as their ages and abilities decrease. Without multi-generational partners more of this work has to be 'hired out', so to speak.

“The real fountain of youth is the fountain with youth.”  -Marc Freedman

This thought comes from an article I found online, called "The Real Trick to Staying Young Forever"
I confess, I was triggered by the 'young forever' part and started to read so that I could argue.  

It mentions a study begun in 1938 (not a typo) that tracked 268 Harvard sophomores for EIGHTY years.  This study found that relationships, especially those with multi-generations, produced the greatest physical and mental health.

These relationships don't just benefit we Elders, though.
Another 40 year study in Hawaii followed 700 children from the age of 1 to age 40 and focused on resilience.
Their short definition of resilience was defined as "why some kids thrive under adversity and others do not".
You can guess their results and why it's included here.

The article also talks about how the generations came to be so separate; the consequences of this separation, and how we might get back together.
And it touches on a Cleveland Elder living community that offers an artist-in-residence program for young musicians which exchanges housing for concerts and interaction at meals, etc.  The article also mentions in brief several other programs designed to connect young people with Elders.

"Almost eight in 10 people between 18 and 24 and the over-65s want life to slow down, and social care
for older people remains the second-highest concern for 18-to-34-year-olds.
The issue is not whether they have anything in common, but how to connect them."    -from the article

Yes, this is me proselytizing. I hope you enjoy the article.   Kate W.